godsays | 36 metals ; homeward

[ private to marsh ]

Do you think your god - the new god - could use someone like me?

[ spam, cassel ]

[ He seeks Cassel out, after the conversation with Marsh, knocks at his door. Cassel is family; family is the first he's going to tell.

He won't be gone forever. Just for a little while. Just enough to get his bearings again. ]

[ spam, emperor ]

[ Lying idly in the Emperor's garden, brushing a soft leaf between his fingertips. ]

I'm going to go home.

[ This is stated somewhat tentatively. Not because he isn't mostly sure about the decision, but because he isn't sure how it will be taken. ]

[ video, locked to close cr; includes Cassel, Barbara, Iris, Bush, Chris, Anya, Charles, Morgana, Kelsier, Marsh, Vin, Emperor, possibly others I have missed, ask if confused ]

I'm going - home. To Scadrial. The planet where I was born. Years after I died, and I hear it's a little different now, but I'm going.

I'm don't think I'm ready for this - being a warden - yet. That's all.

I'll be back. This is more home to me than anywhere else has been.

[ locked to mistcast ]

If there's anything you want me to find, or find out, tell me now.

[ video ; open ]

I'll be leaving, temporarily. If you have business with me, we should conclude it now.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yes.

And I'll be back.

I don't think I'm ready to be a warden yet.

Ah. Yes.

[Most days, neither does he. But it's easier for him to do an impossible duty than defy the Admiral's easygoing authority. The thought of leaving makes him a bit uneasy.

Zane's a brave young man.]

I'm going to miss you. Will you come by and say goodbye before you go?

People keep saying that. I was afraid they would think it's cowardly.

Only people who've never had to fight think it's cowardly to be prepared for one.

I should miss you even if you were, though.

Is that what I'm doing? Preparing for a fight?

...I'll miss you. I'll miss everything here.

It ain't a fight, maybe, but it's not like being a tradesman or a farmer or something. We aren't civilians.

Come back when you can. I wish I could write to you but I don't know how it'd get delivered.

I won't be gone for long. Not from here, anyway.

There, I might be gone a long time.

You'll have forgot us all, soon enough. 'Who are these sad blunderers,' you'll say when you come back. [But he is teasing even if it is melancholy teasing.]

My family.

That's who they are.

-well bless you, lad!

[He will be teary-eyed in another moment.]

Come shake my hand before you go, even if it won't be long.

I will.

[ And he does - he'll come by, after the conversations are done, perhaps after he's said another handful of goodbyes. It seems jarring to him; he thinks he'll be away for weeks, at most, here, but he knows that he will feel the absence more keenly. Weeks won't be enough to do what he wants to do. ]

[Bush is having trouble making himself understand that it is a matter of days and not months or years. He knows, but he feels as if it must be longer-- all his partings have always had the chance of being final. That is why when Zane comes, he wrings his hand, and looks at him with his all his painful, uncomplicated affection.]

I will be back.

[ Nothing else to say. He will. He'll make sure of it. And the duration won't be so long, even if the goodbye hurts. ]

You had better, sir-!

[That is the 'sir' of a gruff captain to a young liuetenant off on some dangerous expedition. Bush is struggling with sentiment he feels will embarrass both of them and is a little pompous in consequence.]

I'll wish you luck.

I'll take it.

[ Quiet smile. He's not confident in the least, but he's not outwardly scared, either. He can handle this. ]

I hope I can be useful. There.

Good luck, Zane. All the best of fortune. [Bush nods firmly, and releases his hand.]

36 metals ; homeward

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