godsays | 17th metal . text

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17th metal . text

[ Kelsier brought him a rabbit.

A strange-looking rabbit with fur around its face. And then Kelsier left.

Zane stares at the rabbit.

It stares back.

He picks up his communicator, finally, breaking a long silence. He doesn't want to go through the process of apologizing to people. He wants them to be apologized to, but he can't... he doesn't know how to begin.

So: ]

What do you do with a rabbit

[ deck spam ]

[ ...and now he is hunting. On deck. For the hidden rabbit supplies. Damn it Kelsier. ]

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[ He finally spots something. Stoops and pulls a bag of grass out from behind a bench. Fresh hay - green-tinted. It's good, and the rabbit perks up on seeing it. ]

Nothing.

[He just - runs his hands over his face, exasperated.]

Zane, you're being a huge dick. What shoulds?

I mean you're becoming a warden.

[ And he shouldn't be upset about it. But he is.

He slides a bit of hay free, and the rabbit bites enthusiastically, nibbling through it. He sets her on the ground to have more. ]

[He winces and slides his gaze away, watching the rabbit some more.]

You . . . think I shouldn't?

You should do what you think is right.

That's not really an answer.

[But Zane has to know that. Cassel hunches his shoulders.]

It just feels like everything safe is falling away, and I'm going to have to make the choice to stay here and do something that scares me, or - leave everybody. Which is why I asked.

[Part of why he asked.]

You're going to stay.

I just didn't know it would be so soon.

. . . I'm sorry.

[He really is. It feels like he's betrayed Zane in the worst way. Or at least second to worst.]

Don't.

[Chewing his lip, he looks at Zane uncertainly. What?]

It's not your fault I can't get better.

[Wow, everything about that statement is stupid. He frowns, then kneels down like he had with Aster; focus on the creature without ulterior motives. He reaches out his hand to pet her back once, gently, then pulls away, hands at his sides.]

[ She holds still under Cassel's hand, as though being patiently tolerant of his touch, her teeth gnawing on the straw. ]

[After another moment, during which his fingers twist in confusion against his palm, he looks up at Zane again.]

If I tell you that you can, are you going to yell at me again?

Maybe.

[. . . Fine. It's worth the risk.]

You can.

Not before you leave me behind.

Not before I graduate. No.

[He crosses his legs and . . . just sort of sits, not looking at much of anything.]

[ He gathers up the rabbit, and then the bag of grass.

If Cassel doesn't stop him, he'll take her away - to put her back in his room, food intact now. ]