godsays | metal 057 . video . bunnycam

metal 057 . video . bunnycam

[ The camera is carefully placed to give it a full view of a large basket full of hay, cotton, and baby rabbits. There are six of them, sleeping in a pile. The fur ranges from dark grey to mostly white with some splotches, and they. are. tiny. ]

Someone watch these.

There are battles to fight.

Blanket battles.

[ The camera will continue, off and on, for several hours. The bunnies wake up, wriggle around, do cute things, nibble on a little fresh grass, play with each other. Sometimes Dani, dark grey and fluffy around the neck, joins them. ]

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[...damn it, Zane, Allison is still angry at you. Very angry.

DO NOT SHOVE CUTE LITTLE BUNNIES INTO THE FEED WHEN SHE'S TRYING TO HATE YOU.]

...I don't think I've ever seen anything that tiny before. They're just...they're perfect, Zane.

I know. [ PROUD UNCLE ZANE CANNOT HANDLE THEMMM ]

But someone has to fight this age-old battle. [ between blankets and pillows......... yes. ]

[For a moment, Allison is afraid until she remembers the flood. And the forts.

...and the blanket enclave she's constructed next to the ball pit. She isn't feeling the same compulsions as the rest of the ship...but she's going to die, life is short, and she's taking a pretty solid break from maturity by choice, because if the Barge is going to flood pillow forts and blanket caves and ball pits? Why the hell not?]

I'm totally on Team Blankets, I've got this covered. Hey, do any of the babies have names yet? What about...that one, with the gray blotch over their eye?

[Yes. Keep the proud uncle distracted so nobody gets stabbed during a pillow fight. They're baby bunnies. This will be easy.]

I can come help you. Defend your position.

I have handwoven blankets.

[ He says this, as though announcing some sort of deadly weapon. ]

And she doesn't have a name. The people who adopt them can give them names. Or they can just have the names they call each other.

...yeah. Sure. Awesome. But you tried to kill one of my best friends, so trust issues say 'pass.'

[She pauses, then blinks. Did he just say...]

Do you...speak bunny or something?

But there's a war. A fluffy war.

...no. Only bunnies speak bunny.

Okay, focus, Zane.

How do you know what they call each other if you don't understand them? The bunnies.

I didn't say I know what they call each other.

...then how do you know they call each other anything at all?

They know each other.

But they're bunnies.

Baby bunnies.

I know.

So...how can they have names to call each other? Private names?

They probably don't even know that they're bunnies.

Of course they know. Otherwise how would they know to run from dogs and not from each other?

Dude, they don't know they're dogs. They just know they're big, loud, growly, and to a baby bunny? Probably stinky.

They don't do that to each other. So they don't run away. They just...chill.

So they know they're one thing, a safe thing, and dogs are another thing. A dangerous thing.

Right! They don't know it's called a dog, it's just big growly gonna eat me thing. And other bunnies are just quiet fuzzy not gonna eat me things.

....I didn't mean that they speak English.

Oh. My. God. They're baby bunnies you don't know they speak anything. They're babies.

They're old enough to grow fur and open their eyes.

So is the stuff that lives in the back of the fridge. Difference is, baby bunnies get cuter and cuddlier with age. The stuff in the fridge grows up to take over Cleveland.

...now you're not making sense.

This whole conversation stopped making sense as soon as we started debating the names baby bunny rabbits call each other.

Well, they have to call each other something.

...okay, forget the bunny part for a second. They're babies. Babies can't communicate.

Not even human babies. They don't have names for people or each other...they don't even know their own names.

[video]

godsays - 2014-09-02 18:40 (UTC) - Expand

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