godsays | 37 metals ; returning!

[ Forward dated to after the event. ]

It's been raining on and off for days, sweet downpours punctuated with bright yellow sun. Zane has grown almost accustomed to the dampness in the air, like an unwrung-cloth, sopping wet. The crops are almost done planting, and when he looks back on it, looks back on them, he realizes it's time. Something about the confluence of the gold light and the working skaa - no, not skaa, not anymore. Something about the anticipation in the air. Hopelessness turned around.

He makes his way back into the village, and once or twice there is someone bold enough to step up and brush against the spike through Zane's heart.

Steelheart.

He steps into the little hut, and he breathes out.

Now that he's alone, he's struck by nervousness. Will it be the same? He brushes drying mud off his hands.

I will miss you, I think, comes a voice in his mind. A familiar one, by now. You ask very keen questions.

Zane half-smiles. "How did you know?" he asks the empty air.

You have been ready to return for weeks, says God. I have only been waiting for you to choose it.

A slow nod. "Thank you," says Zane. "For everything."

He'll be back. He knows this. He has another home, now, if he chooses.

[ emperor ]

[ Doesn't even bother to wash first: mud-covered, he opens the Emperor's door and slips inside, looking for his lover. He pads across grass and earth and slides arms around him - from behind, if the Emperor is not looking, or just pulling him into a kiss before there is a chance to speak. ]

[ cassel, morgana, marsh, iris, vin ]

[ He searches each of them out, first, before he says anything, before he announces that he is back. He holds himself a little differently, now, and his skin is darker from the sun.

He may still have a fair amount of mud on him. ]

[ video ]

I'm… here.

[ Sun-darkened, a streak of dried mud on his face and in his hair. He brushes fingers through his hair and dislodges a little of it. ]

…Back, I mean.

It's good to be here.

[ placeholder for christmas lists ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Cassel's walking on deck, hands in his pockets, thinking about - stuff, lots of things. Christmas, mostly, and how he has to make it right for Chris, and his birthday and how he should probably mention that, and how he misses his brother. Brothers. Both of them. All of them.]

[Then he turns and Zane's there, mud-covered and smelly, and he doesn't hesitate: he just runs, colliding with him solidly and wrapping his arms around him, refusing to let go.]

[ He squeezes Cassel tight, maybe too tight, equally unwilling to let go. He'd missed Cassel so much. Like an ache, a missing piece. He'd stayed away too long. But he'd wanted to be sure. ]

I missed you.

[ Inadequate words. They don't convey the amount he feels, the relief, the surge of love. ]

Missed you too.

[His face is covered in mud, and he feels like his world has fallen back into place.]

How long was it? For you?

Too long. Too, too long - I got a little afraid to come back, after a while. Things moved so slowly there, and I was never sure if I was ready.

[ He's sort of babbling. It's hard to express what he's thinking, feeling. ]

I want to tell you everything. There were villagers, and God had me go rescue a flower - and I have something for you.

A fl-- what? Shut up, man, none of that made sense.

Except the part about the present. [He pulls back.] What'd you get me?

[ He pulls back, in mirror, to dig the handful of coins out of his pocket. ]

This one's a boxing... This is a clip. [ He names the rest of them, and on the last, turns it over to show the alchemical symbol carved into the soft face. ] And this is the symbol for duralumin. [ He lets them all fall into Cassel's hands. ]

I know you like tokens. Little things that are symbols for something else. I've used all the clips here to fight with.

[For a minute Cassel's incredibly confused - what is he supposed to do with coins from a different world, coins he could easily forge? - but Zane's expression makes him smile. He puts them all away in his pocket but one, which he turns over in his palm until he learns its texture through his gloves.]

[Duralumin. That's for him.]

Did you win? [He glances up, grinning wickedly.]

[ An answering smile - a little smirk. ] I always win.

Damn right.

Thanks. I'm keeping them. Forever. [Because he's a sap, that's why.]

Did it help? [Will you have to go back?]

Good.

[ Gifts accepted, and Zane feels satisfied for it. Happier. ]

It did. But I choose to be here, now. Really choose, not just choose because there's nowhere else to go. I think just choosing to face the bad things about the Barge makes them less - awful, somehow.

I think so, too.

[Although maybe not as much as Zane does. Because Cassel is content here. Maybe it's that he's so desperately afraid of home and what it represents that going back isn't an option, at least not now. He doesn't really know.]

[At least his family is back again. All of it.]

Do you feel stronger?

No. I don't think I'm different.

[ Maybe he is. He doesn't feel so different - not the way the Barge changes came, like sharp jerks and pulls on him more disorienting than a steelfight. ]

...maybe more thoughtful. But I was always this strong.

[He smiles now. Not with the relief of seeing Zane back or the pleasure at receiving a gift; just simple pride.]

At least you know it, now. Right?

I'll probably have moments of doubt.

That's what you're here for.

What happened while I was gone?

37 metals ; returning!

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